Lifestyle

If you spot a purple butterfly sticker near a newborn, it is important to understand its meaning

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Oct 17, 2024 / 5384 Views

Evan Walker

When Millie Smith and Lewis Cann found out they were expecting a baby, they were overjoyed. As there was a history of twins in Millie’s family, she had a strong feeling that she was going to give birth to two little ones, and her instincts were right. The ultrasound confirmed that she was indeed expecting twins, but the doctors told them that one of the babies had a very small chance of survival.

ragically, one of their daughters was born at 30 weeks with anencephaly, a serious condition that affects the development of the brain and spinal cord. They learned that their precious baby had only moments or hours to live.

Knowing this, Millie and Lewis wanted to give her a name before they said goodbye. They chose the name Skye. Millie explained: “We felt she needed a name before she arrived. Knowing she wouldn’t be with us for long, I wanted her to have a name in those fleeting moments”.

The name “Skye” symbolized a connection to a place they could always remember when they looked up to the sky. “We held Skye close as she died. It was the most heartbreaking moment of our lives, but I’m proud that she fought to spend that time with us.” Skye only lived for three hours, a brief time filled with love while her parents cherished her beauty and presence.

After her death, Millie and Lewis were supported by a “bereavement midwife” and given access to a “Daisy Room”, a special room where parents could spend time with their baby before and after death. However, after Skye was gone, her memory seemed to fade; no one spoke of her, leaving Millie feeling like her daughter had never existed, which made her angry.

“Most of the nurses knew what had happened, but as the weeks went by, people stopped mentioning Skye. Other families around me had no idea about our loss”, Millie recalls.

While her other daughter, Callie, was still in the NICU, another mother who knew nothing about Millie’s situation remarked how lucky she was not to have twins. “None of the other parents knew about Skye, and that innocent comment almost broke me. I left the room in tears but didn’t have the heart to explain”, Millie said. “A simple sticker could have prevented this.”

This experience inspired Millie to design a sticker for incubators to mark the loss of one or more babies in a multiple birth. She chose butterflies to symbolise the ‘flown away’ babies and used the colour purple, which is suitable for any gender.

From this idea grew the Skye High Foundation, which promotes the Purple Butterflies initiative and helps raise awareness in hospitals around the world. The foundation also offers a range of purple butterfly merchandise.

“Although I can’t prevent these situations from occurring, I believe the more support we can provide through initiatives like the stickers, the better it will be for others who suffer this loss. It’s an incredibly tough journey”, said Millie. Today, her surviving daughter Callie is seven years old.

My Husband Took This Photo of Me Just Before I Threw My Rings: I Learned a True Lesson in Life

This past Sunday, the day began with the promise of a beautiful morning on a boat cruise with my husband, Jack. We were basking in the sun, the gentle sway of the boat calming our spirits. Our conversation flowed easily, filled with laughter and shared memories. It was one of those perfect mornings that seemed to bring us closer together, making me appreciate our life and love.

But suddenly, the atmosphere shifted. Jack’s demeanor changed from light-hearted to serious. He took a deep breath, his eyes filled with a mix of regret and fear. “Baby, I’m so sorry,” he began, his voice trembling. “I have to tell you something. I’m so sorry, please forgive me. I had an affair.”

The Heartbreaking Revelation
Those words hit me like a tidal wave. My heart pounded in my chest, and I felt a surge of emotions – disbelief, rage, and an overwhelming sense of betrayal. I am not a confrontational person by nature, so I didn’t scream or cry. Instead, I stood up, numb with shock, and removed my wedding and engagement rings. With a swift motion, I hurled them into the vast, unforgiving ocean.

Jack’s reaction was instant. His eyes widened in horror, and his mouth fell open. “What have you done?” he shouted, his voice cracking. “It was a joke, a prank! I wasn’t serious!”

But it was too late. The rings, symbols of our love and commitment, were gone, sinking into the depths of the sea. My anger flared. “Because of your cruel joke, I’ve thrown away your family engagement ring!” I screamed back, tears now streaming down my face.

The Aftermath of a Cruel Joke
Jack’s face turned as white as a sheet. He started to panic, his breathing becoming erratic. “Do you realize what you’ve done?” he screamed. “That ring was a family heirloom, passed down through generations! It was irreplaceable!”

His words cut through my anger like a knife. The gravity of my actions hit me, and I felt a wave of regret. But the damage was done. There was no retrieving the rings from the ocean. I had acted out of blind rage and hurt, and now we both had to face the consequences.

The boat ride back to shore was a silent, tense affair. Jack was devastated, and I was left grappling with a whirlwind of emotions. Was it right to react the way I did? Did his prank justify my drastic action? These questions haunted me, and I knew that our relationship had been irrevocably altered.

Reflecting on Consequences
As we disembarked and made our way home, the silence between us was deafening. Jack’s shoulders were slumped, his face etched with pain and regret. I couldn’t bring myself to look at him. My mind was racing, replaying the events over and over.

That night, we sat down to talk. Jack apologized profusely, explaining that he never intended to hurt me. It was supposed to be a joke, a misguided attempt to lighten the mood. He admitted that it was a terrible mistake, one that he would regret for the rest of his life.

I listened, my heart heavy. I knew that forgiveness wouldn’t come easily. The trust between us had been shattered, and it would take time to rebuild. We both needed to reflect on our actions and understand the impact they had on our relationship.

Rebuilding Trust
In the weeks that followed, Jack and I sought counseling to help us navigate the fallout of that fateful day. It was a difficult journey, filled with painful conversations and soul-searching. But we were committed to healing and rebuilding our trust.