Kirby Wouldn't Turn Into A Hot Man If He Ate A Hot Man, Says Game Director

It's amazing that after 30 years of Kirby, only now has someone thought to ask the most important questions. Queries regarding what happens to Kirby's enemies after he swallows them, and since Kirby adopts the powers of some of the enemies and items he hoovers up, would he turn into a hot man if he were to inhale a hot man? Unfortunately, the answer to the latter is a big fat no.

Polygon had the opportunity to chat with HAL Laboratory's executive director Shinya Kumazaki (thanks, Kotaku) and finally asked the Kirby creator the important questions. When asked if swallowing a hot man will turn Kirby into a hot man, while Kumazaki said no, he didn't merely brush off the question and move on. He had a proper and serious answer.

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“I think your friend might have noticed the muscles and power the images depicted. I think Kirby’s ability would be in line with that. And he’d probably have a hat associated with it. But his face would not turn into hot Kirby,” Kumazaki confirmed. The images he's referencing were superheroes shown alongside Kirby and other characters from the series at GDC that some thought might be their human counterparts, but apparently not.

Just to put the matter to bed for good, Polygon followed up by asking whether the usually round Kirby would adopt sharp angles if he were to suck up a hot guy, to which Kumazaki simply replied “still round”. Disappointing? Perhaps, but it's to be expected. If you have played any Kirby Games, or even used the character in Super Smash Bros, you'll agree that the ability to suddenly turn into a tall buff man would be pretty jarring, not to mention stir up some confusing feelings in the process.

In the same interview, Kumazaki also confirmed Kirby isn't digesting his enemies once they're inside him. They're actually being teleported elsewhere and Kirby just keeps their power. Good to know. The idea of Kirby's enemies being subjected to slow deaths in a shallow pool of stomach acid might almost be enough for me to bring my current Return To Dream Land Deluxe playthrough to a premature end.

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